We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Randomize
