Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize
