the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize
