I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
