You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
