I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
