Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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