Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
