Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I wanna bring you to show and tell
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
