bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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