I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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