You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
