last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
