my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Randomize
