Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize