halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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