i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize