You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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