so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize