I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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