Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
