your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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