ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
