I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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