You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
