The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
