I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
