He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Do vagina's smell?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
