This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Drake has all the answers
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize