hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
