So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
meet me or not, i'm out of control
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Randomize
