I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Randomize
