she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
honey bunches of taint.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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