Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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