u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
