i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
