508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
