Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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