i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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