i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
