IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
