well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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