I must be too annoying 4 u.
We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
not ubering you a puppy
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
