It's just like the Real World with babies
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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