I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
so that wasnt chicken after all
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
