She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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