No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
