50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
