I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You need Xanax blowdarts
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
