Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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